I’m not a fan of brunch. It’s a fake made up meal for people to walk around all fancy saying “Oh I’m going to brunch. Maybe I’ll have a mimosa.” Let’s just get it out there, brunch is just an excuse to have breakfast with alcohol. I’m a firm believer in establishing a firm dichotomy betwixt meals. Oh Phatman that’s a fancy word. Do you even know what it means? I resent that. Simply put, a dichotomy is a feminine product used during sexy time to avoid getting knocked up. Totally just schooled you.
Still don’t agree with me? Here’s a good example: say you take medicine with a long list of possible side effects. Two of those effects are constipation and explosive diarrhea. You can get one or the other but not both. Well for the love of all that is good and pure I sure as hell hope you can’t get both. I can’t begin to imagine how that would play out.
But as much as I would love to be able to firmly set lines between meals I know I’m fighting a losing battle. Having a cement head like I do though I am not giving in to this brunch business. I’m inventing my own meal. My old man’s already got the market cornered on Lupper (he’s also an avid brunch hater and an inspiration to hard headed grumps everywhere) so I’m going with Supfast.
What’s Supfast you ask? Oh not much, what’s Supfast with you? In a stroke of evil genius I am combining breakfast and supper. Those meals aren’t even adjacent! Groundbreaking stuff, I know.
Wow that sure was a long way to say that I’m making pancakes for supper.
Lemon Vanilla Pancakes
Makes 12 Pancakes
1 Cup self-rising flour
1 Cup milk (I use 1%)
1 Egg (shell removed)
1/2 Teaspoon vanilla extract
Zest of 1 lemon
Pinch of sea salt
4 Blobs of butter
I felt much sadness when I found out that my grandmother made pancakes from a box. I always raved about how amazing they were and she weaselly never admitted it to me. When I later realized how easy they were to make from scratch I was devastated. I just hope I never find out that her oatmeal cookies were all a lie too.
I tell my kids that we’re having pancakes and they look at me like I’m foolish because well, I often do foolish things. They’re on board with it though and think it’s an amazingly crazy idea, or was it crazily amazing? Anyway, let’s begin. Add your flour to a mixing bowl and make a little divet in the middle and crack your egg in there. Add a pinch of sea salt, the milk, the vanilla and lemon zest. Whisk with sadness and longing for your lost youth.
Heat up a pan on medium heat and melt in 1 of the butter blobs. When the butter begins to brown slightly use a ladle to pour in 3 equal sized gloops of pancake batter. Let it cook for about 2 minutes. You’ll see them start to form some funky bubbles on top. That’s around when you want to flip them. Once turned over they only need to cook for another minute. WAZAM! You got homemade pancakes. Place the first batch on a plate in the oven at the lowest temperature to keep warm.
One thing to make sure you do between batches is to wipe down the pan with a paper towel before adding the next blob of butter. Otherwise it will go really dark and give your pancakes a burny taste. That’s pretty much it. They come out super fluffy and the vanilla and lemon give them a certain Supfast fanciness that breakfast or brunch just can’t compete with.
I served it up with some fresh fruits, Supfast style sausages and of course maple syrup. The kids thought that eating this at night was hilarious and it made for a fun meal for the 3 of us. Face it people. Supfast is gonna be a thing. You can’t stop it so just embrace it. I can just hear cool people everywhere saying “So dude what do you wanna do tonight?” “How about we go for some Supfast?” “Dude! Supfast!” In the end don’t we just want to be cool?